Paradroid

It’s much, much later. Most of my thoughts can be summed up in 140 characters and that limit is what Twitter does best - I post there more than here, right? Most of my blogging gets stopped because it’s such a big, overwhelming, daunting task. Twitter’s worthless and throw-away. That’s its winning attribute. The killer-app for everyone is a million of your friends’ fortune cookies. Who’d have thought?

My problem is though I’ve that contact I want more than that. Sometimes that throwaway comment spawns a whole discussion that doesn’t suit Twitter and could be taken somewhere else without these limit or at least it could if that existed. Maybe someone needs to code something like that.

It’s summer. Later…

Britain’s been been snowed in for the last few weeks yet Wales, or at least Haverfordwest, seems to have avoided most of it. Token gestures of hail, snow and sleet have fallen here but nothing notable, nothing requiring me to buy a shovel at least. Last month’s predictions were totally misguided. It’s cold. I get it. I’ll have a Spring, please.

But plans are underway. Some friends and I are planning a holiday in Cyprus. I’ve never been there before or, as it happens, anywhere with all of them but it’s a new country to add to my countries-that-I’ve-been-to list. It’s something of a plan-b too, should we have a summer like last.

I’m thinking about the weather a lot recently. I don’t know why. I spend most of my time indoors.

I’m going through the long process of ripping my audio collection into iTunes. It’s a weird experience. I know that a lot of this music, I’ll never listen to again but some part of me wants it there, just incase. It feels somewhat backwards. Everything is online these days, right? Right now I’m typing into a form on some server in a totally different country. Anyway, I digress. It’s actually been nice to go over my audio collection. The prize isn’t having all the CDs I listen to to hand, though that’s nice, but the ones that I haven’t listened to recently or didn’t care for back then. Tastes change, subtly. I’m doing my big stack of Underworld right now.

“I get my kicks on channel six.”

I’m still playing Fable. I’m not sure why. I feel like I want to finish it but it doesn’t feel especially rewarding. Its whole emotions/actions is ridiculous. The idea of your actions reflecting peoples attitude is the least subtle gameplay mechanic I can think of. Press A to do a humorous fart and have everyone love you or press B to growl at them and have them hate you. If I ever play this again, I’m going to kill everyone as fast as I can. I tried being nice. I wonder who else decided to be evil on their first play through?

I’ve watched a few films recently but the only ones that I feel like recommending are The Escapist and Gran Torino.

Posting about how you should have posted can be sickeningly meta so that stops right here.

Saying that, it does seem like last year that I posted. Ahem. Santacon was good, a real step up from last year’s mixed reviews. I think the locals are starting to almost expect it this year. First time, it was a novelty but now they’re all of the view “Thousands of Santas? Saw that last year.” Scrooges. Who cares. Santa loves to drink and he did. Oh yes, he did.

Christmas was great. I took a couple of extra days off and turned a week into a couple. Coming home for Christmas made it more special too, with a warm house, a stocked fridge and more chocolates than you can shake a… your already-chocolaty fingers at.

Since getting back to Wales, it’s been bastard-cold. Coldest winter since the ice-age or whatever they’ve been reporting. Fortunately, the cold snap seems to have broken and the rain is a watery reminder that at least it’s not freezing anymore. Yes, I know it’s very British of me to talk about weather but, hey, not everyone’s from around here, okay?

I don’t have any resolutions (apart from 1440 by 900) but I’m trying to get Wii fit this year. I get the feeling that my metabolism is finally slowing down so walking to the shops to buy crisps and coke isn’t enough anymore. Wii Fit is, however, delightful in the way that Wii Sports was. Miniaturized again although, this time, definitely enjoyed on your own.

PS Buy Burial’s Untrue, fools.

I went to London to see Jonathan Coulton with Tom and Leila last weekend. I met up with JPH after and went to a Haloween party as the ghost of James Dean. In retrospect, the corpse of James Dean could have been more fun but these ideas never come when you’re pressed for time and struggling to find a cheap, feasable costume in time. At least with Santacon, you’ve got time and a base from which to work from. This year, I’m going as Communist Santa!

“From each, presents according to his ability; to each, presents according to his needs.”

We saw Burn After Reading and I’m still not sure how I feel about it which is a possibly valid conclusion. Maybe I’m meant to sympathise with the CIA agents most of all. I don’t know. Maybe it needs another watch but I don’t feel especially inclined to just yet. The photography is great though, especially in the hallways. JPH and I also watched Gonzo, another Hunter S Thompson documentary.

I bought Portal: Still Alive, because I’m a sucker and I can’t get enough of it. Once I’d downloaded it, I started playing and thought “hold on, this is like the original… or is it suddenly going to change?” A couple of hours later, I’d completed the game again, baffled as to where these extra levels had gone. Anyway, it turns out that the extra levels are all under “challenge mode” and the description’s perfect. Each level seems to have been crafted with the purpose of initially appearing impossible. It’s a whole different experience though — solitary but equally satisfying.

I’ve also resumed my interest in the Gameboy Advance, after taking the somewhat hazardous choice of playing a game in its original Japanese. Not that I had the choice — I’m not that weird. I just really dislike the non-complete localisation of games, especially when they’re from Nintendo and exceptionally fun. Rhythm Tengoku is its name and, damn, it’s totally ruined my growing, seething hate of rhythm-action games. With a little occasional help the language hasn’t been much of a barrier to the core of the game. The other thing I’ve disliked about rhythm games is that it’s not the rhythm that I’m fighting with, it’s the number of different button positions I have to remember. Pop quiz: where’s the Square on the Playstation controller? How about the X? Now where’s the X on the Xbox360? Are you sure? Screw that — give me A, B, Start and a directional pad. If you don’t have a GBA or can’t take the Japanese, there’s a DS version called Rhythm Heaven coming out “Sometime in 2008″. A likely story…

So, I’d mentioned some time ago that my next computer would be a Mac. Well, My PC is finally showing its age and there’s these new sparkly MacBooks out now. I think that the only sensible course of action is to bite the bullet and cough up the Apple-tax. It served me well, since 2002 with only a graphics card update and a new drive. Six years is a long time in computing but, come on, it doesn’t even have PCI Express or SATA.

Anyway, the Mac (I went for a MacBook Pro) should turn up sometime this week. I’m excited!

I completed Professor Layton and the Curious Village and it was delightful. I don’t think I’ve ever played a puzzle game with such production values and polish on any platform, let alone a DS. The game feels like it’s a Nintendo-published game of Mario Galaxy quality.  Sure, the puzzles are nearly entirely arbitrarily cut into the story, but how else are you going to get 120 self-contained logic puzzles in one quite short story? I don’t care. It’s value for money.

I’m still playing Geometry Wars: Retro Evolved 2 and Grand Theft Auto IV.

I survived Bestival, just about.

I was hoping, mostly, for a repeat of last year. I hoped to lay out on the ground, watching someone play on the bandstand, soak up the sun near our tents and watch the big acts come out in the evening and blow us away. In those respects, it was something of a failure… ’something’ meaning ‘the epitome of’. The only weather I soaked up was the rain and in many ways, for many people, it was a disaster. JPH’s flat-situation was particularly unwanted, causing him to have to leave early. In some respects, it was a great escape.

All paths turned into mud. Watery mud in the central areas, thicker, soft mud that you could lose a small child in and everything between covered the site. The pictures don’t do it justice. It was mud as far as the eye can see.

For those of us who continued in our bloody-minded mud-parade, there were some rewards. Aphex Twin was good, Underworld was great (but a little rushed) and Beardyman was superb. I’ve never seen someone take beat-boxing out of its genre without skipping a.. ugh.. beat. Using a sampler, he layered up his voice into Don’t Worry, Be Happy, Teardrop by Massive Attack and a load of techno in the middle. The guy’s a nut.

Each day got better and better though. Waking up on the last morning, the weather was as close to summer as it’s been this year. We packed our bags and struggled onto the ferry home, safe in the knowledge that we wouldn’t have to do that for at least another year.

I’m going to Bestival this weekend. Rain’s expected so I’ve bought some wellies and a waterproof coat. I’m probably going to end up covered in mud either way. Still, the line-up looks extraordinary. Aphex twin and Underworld are both required seeing but it’s not about choosing who to see, it’s accepting that there are a few that I’m going to have to miss.

Oh yeah. In other news, I’ve moved from my old mouldy flat to a new (to me) flat without. It’s also without internets until next week too… meh. It does have a TV reception though, which makes me feel like I’m some kind of neanderthal, watching the idiot-box, even if it is in high-def and as big as my car’s windscreen.

So close your eyes and imagine that this post is a PowerPoint presentation because it’s bullet points and imagine me expanding on each item. Thanks. Now open your eyes to read the rest.

• Batman was quite good.
• Geometry Wars 2 is excellent.
• Braid appears to be good.
• Bionic Commando is a total disappointment and doesn’t even deserve a link.
• No More Heroes is weird, good.
• I’m enjoying Flight of the Conchords
• I’m moving (to a flat adjacent to mine).
• I’m totally looking forward to Bestival.

I’m pretty sure something else significant has happened or will be happening any time soon but I can’t think what and I wanted to get this blog entry out because it feels like it’s turning into brain-crack.

Just look at how people are Using Photographs to Enhance Videos of a Static Scene instead. Check out the video. Someone should totally glue that and Photosynth together.

I saw WALL-E and Wanted since I last posted.

WALL-E’s great. It pushes the envelope that little bit like all Pixar’s good films do. The story’s great and Pixar manage to pull off the dialogue-free first 30 minutes effortlessly. The lack of robot-dialogue is not a complaint. It just couldn’t have been done better. I’m close to saying this is my favourite Pixar film yet. It’s pretty much made for me. The visuals need to be seen by anyone who has any interest in Jonathan Ive’s design or Chris Cunningham’s Björkbots.

I’m confused about Wanted. I originally saw the trailer because it looked hilariously bad and, sometimes, I just have to know. It starts off trying to be Office Space, then it’s Fight Club with guns, then it’s Snakes on a Plane, then it’s over. Never have the ingredients of so many good films created such a mess. It’s certainly watchable as there’s usually some kind of thing happening on screen but don’t expect it to know what kind of movie it is. It’s watchable but it’s also pretty much disposable, and that’s what it fails to see.

The Jordans Breakfast-in-a-bar is only a suitable breakfast if your idea of breakfast is a breakfast bar.